My biggest mistake: Chantelle de la Rey, chief executive officer of Disruptiv

The world of fintech and crypto isn’t exactly swarming with women, and there’s few who know this better than Chantelle de la Rey.

Breaking down the barriers of gender equality is one thing, but having to do so in an emerging market is another challenge all in itself.

While de la Rey has built Disruptiv and Swaps, she’s also faced many challenges along the way — and made a few mistakes.

The biggest of them all, de la Rey tells SmartCompany Plus, was simple — and one that many women face, regardless of industry. It all came down to never asking for help.

The mistake

De la Rey admits that, when she first started out in business, she was “trying to make everything perfect and trying to impress everyone”.

“I thought being an entrepreneur meant I had to slave away at my business, placing me and my health second.”

But as de la Rey quickly found out, this led to chronic fatigue. And who can build a business when they’re exhausted?

De la Rey acknowledges she was “trying to do too much” to get her startups off the ground.

“We tried maintaining and launching apps at times with a very small team,” she says of the early days at Disruptiv.

This ‘small team’ was under 10 people — including software developers, UX/UI designers, product managers, and marketers — who were working across two projects. It inevitably caused “friction and frustration” both internally for de la Rey, and with those around her.

“There was no clarity, things kept breaking and resources were not there to keep both apps alive.”

The context

De la Rey admits this mistake took place “from the get go”, although the burnout only became evident after the first year of being in business.

“I was working 16 hours a day, training three hours a day, seven days a week,” she recalls.

“There was no time for friends, I was too busy.”

De la Rey says in her first 12 months of business, the team were “trying to make everything perfect, plus trying to do too much”.

“It took us a year just to launch one of our betas, when really it should have only taken a maximum of six months,” she says.

“We wasted time and money. But, most of all, we put extra work, pressure and stress on the team.”

The impact

De la Rey acknowledges this affected not only the business, but also herself — and those around her.

“I burnt myself out and I started to do the same to my team,” she admits. “I lost friendships, my support network, and my health started to deteriorate, making me tired and irritable.”

“There’s not much good in having a burnout leader who is always grumpy, trying to control and do too much.”

De la Rey says she “never asked for help” which saw her becoming more direct and straight to the point, leading her team to feel “attacked” whenever she simply raised her opinion.

“By trying to live up to others expectations, I lost myself and my authenticity,” she admits.

“My team and I needed help, but we were all too afraid and ashamed to ask for it.”

De la Rey says she believed she needed to be more “masculine” to succeed in the fintech world, which saw her ego get in the way of asking for help.

“I didn’t want to come across as stupid.”

The fix

Ultimately, the fix was a lightbulb moment for de la Rey, when she realised that — ego aside — asking for help was far from stupid. In fact, it was “easy, empowering and effortless”.

Albeit, that’s also when she realised the way she’d been going about the business had been a mistake.

De la Ray began asking her team and those around her for support, and started reaching out to other startups and business owners in the field for advice.

“I started to be honest with where I was at mentally. I opened up and was vulnerable which allowed others to see where they could help,” she explains.

“I had to drop my ego and be real with myself [and others] about where I was at.

“When I asked for help, the growth I had within myself was unbelievable. The happiness I saw in others that I delegated work to made them feel empowered.”

So de la Rey put her foot down to “stop the madness” of trying to launch two fintech apps at once, and parked one of the projects to focus on the one that had more potential.

Then she continued to ask for help, figured out what her team was good at, and “empowered them to keep using their strengths”.

The lesson

De la Rey says she initially thought being an entrepreneur meant she had to slave away at her business at all hours, and that her own life and health should always come second.

Now she knows that’s not true.

“I have realised when I allow space in my mind and day-to-day activity the more success and creativity comes to me,” de la Rey says.

If she could turn back the clock, de la Ray says she would definitely get a mentor. She’d also (obviously) ask for help a lot sooner; have time off with friends; and make sure she got some rest — advice de la Rey says she’d give to any other budding entrepreneur, too.

But there’s still a silver lining for de la Rey, even without access to time travel.

“The beauty of [the mistake] means I can now always be honest and reach out when I need help,” she says.